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New Girl - The Curse of the Pirate Bride & Engram Pattersky - Series Finale Review

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Episode: 7.07 "The Curse of the Pirate Bride"
Directed by: Josh Greenbaum
Written by: Ann Kim
Air date: May 15, 2018

It's the day before the wedding and Nick and Jess are celebrating with all their friends who prepare a few memorable toasts. There's even Nadia with her dark and brutally honest stories. But the main attention is quickly focused on Schmidt and Winston who decide to roast the couple, or rather just Nick. They're laughing at their jokes but the rest of the room remains quiet. The jokes are in fact closer to painful truths and end with the conclusion that Jess should run away from Nick while she still can. The duo doesn't seem too moved by the roast as they're busy planning their future during the speeches.

Next morning, Jess's mom (played by Jamie Lee Curtis) shows up at the apartment only to warn the two that sleeping together a night before the wedding will bring nothing but bad luck. Despite all the curse talk, Nick and Jess are happily preparing for the wedding. That is until Jess slips on the wet bathroom floor and is forced to wear an eye patch to cover her injury, thus resulting in the first mention of the Pirate Bride. The curse continues with Jess' mom finding the eviction notice in the mail, which gives Nick and Jess 30 days to leave their apartment. To help Jess relax, her mother offers her marijuana which she brought with her for the trip.

Meanwhile, the familiar faces continue to show up for the series' final episodes and the next is Nick's silent friend, Tran. Their conversations continue to be strangely sweet and revealing. Soon after that reunion, Nick gets good/bad news about his next book. Even though his publisher appears to be a fan of his writing, he believes that "Chicago Hobo" would be too dark for the young readers and is asking Nick to continue the Pepperwood stories instead. At the same time Schmidt and Winston meet up with Jess' dad who openly admits how much he didn't enjoy their toast from the day before. That leads the duo to apologize to Nick and offer any help possible to the groom. Their advice, however, only leads to Nick losing his job altogether.

Back in the apartment, Aly starts going into labor but is doing her best not let anyone know which leaves Cece stuck between the two crisis after she discovers that Jess is high. That's when Russell shows up and though initially it might seem that he's there to help, it soon becomes clear that he's still in love with Jess. Nick enters the scene right after Jess' ex-boyfriend asks her to be with him instead and he attacks Russell on the stairwell. The funny part comes when Jess clearly states she doesn't have any feelings for Russell which actually leads Nick to highlight all his best qualities and wonder about his fiance's choices.

The fight ends before it begins because it's time to take Aly to the hospital and Russell appears to be the only person sober enough to drive her there. When everybody arrives at the hospital, Jess and Russell share a nice goodbye moment before she runs to join her friends. The entire series of these unfortunate events actually makes the bride and groom realize that being cursed is kind of their thing and they decide to run with it instead of always being afraid. So they choose to have "the weirdest wedding of all time" to start their "weird wonderful life together". And they end up getting married in the middle of the hospital, waiting for Aly to deliver the baby. It's short, strange and beautiful. And they lived happily...

Random thoughts:
- Welcome Dan Bill Bishop! No, not Daniel William. Dan Bill.
- Loved the short scenes with Ruth guarding the door to Jess' room. Schmidt being proud after she asks for money was a fun reference.
- Laughed quite a bit at that Nick (+ Winston and Schmidt) vs. Russell fight. Jess summed it up perfectly: "You're all so bad at fighting!"
- Tran talking! "Drive"
- Such a quick, yet hilarious line:
Nick: "Merle said he's not publishing Chicago Hobo and then a bird pooed on me."
Winston: "Where's the bird? I'll poo on him."

Episode: 7.08 "Engram Pattersky"
Directed by: Erin O'Malley
Story by: Dave Finkel & Brett Baer
Teleplay by: Elizabeth Meriwether
Air date: May 15, 2018

It's the final episode of the show, so it seems fitting that we're starting with the announcement that Nick and Jess are moving out of the loft. It's not by their choice, but rather because of the eviction note introduced in the previous episode. They're the only ones who still live there but they realize this might be a big news for all their friends who might have many memories of the place and would also like to say goodbye. Turns out, as hard as sharing this news might be for Jess, the rest of the group seems pretty okay with the decision, even pointing out that they should have moved a long time ago.

Though everybody already has different plans with their kids, Jess refuses to let anyone leave until they all have a chance to celebrate the loft. Nick secretly advises the group to play along with whatever Jess has planned and help them pack in the meantime because they only have the moving track for the next 24 hours. Step 1: Jess searches the loft and finds the things she believes might jump-start the emotions and memories in her friends. That includes Schmidt’s crotch cast from season one, Jess’s tapestry of her roommates and the garbage wand. Step 2: Do all the things the group has never done in the loft before, like standing together on the balcony, Cece cleaning the oven, the girls using the urinals and looking at the empty corner of the apartment.

Meanwhile, Schmidt discovers a secret that Nick has been hiding from him for years - the box labeled "gross stuff" and in the box - dozens of peppermint lotions. The same gift that Schmidt has been giving Nick every year since they met, as a way to celebrate their friendship. His anger actually causes him to accidentally reveal to Jess that everyone was just playing along with her ideas because they want to leave as soon as possible. When the truth hits her, she tells everyone why the loft means so much to her - it's the place where she met all of her friends, which was the best thing that ever happened to her.

The honest confession makes the group realize exactly what this move means and they decide to truly say goodbye, starting with the "Hey Girl" song, or rather an interesting version of it. Later the viewers get to learn a few random stories from the friends' lives, even Winston and Cece's first mess around. The two share a nice moment, as do Schmidt and Nick when Nick finally decides to test his peppermint lotion on his feet. And he also responds to his friend with "I love you, man" for the first time. After all the reminiscing, Jess is ready to say goodbye to apartment 4D. That is until Nick finds one last thing they have to do before they leave - play True American game. And "the floor is lava"!

It's the packing edition of the game, so it's also meant to get Nick and Jess closer to the move. It's also a very special scene, not because of the crazy rules of the game, but because of all the things the viewers get to see intertwined with it - the future. And it's absolutely wonderful. Nick and Jess being happy with their son and playing another version of the game years later with Schmidt and Cece and their two kids, as well as Winston, Aly and a whole bunch of their children. It's a brief scene but it's a beautiful view for the finale. As for the ending itself, Winston reveals that there was no eviction and the notes were actually a part of his greatest prank which he organized with the help of some old friends. Though initially confused and angry, Nick and Jess decide to move anyway and the group drives away together.

I really enjoyed this last season. It was well done, funny, brought back a lot of familiar faces and above all, it left the viewers with the knowledge that the characters they've grown to care about will be happy and together in the future. Hard to ask for a better conclusion. Heartwarming and sweet, with a moment to shine for each character. Will miss this adorkable group for sure.

A Trip Down Memory Lane:
Favorite Couple: Schmidt and Cece
Funniest Duo: Schmidt and Nick
Most Unexpected but Fun Friendship: Cece and Winston
Favorite Final Season Addition: Ruth
Memorable Moments:
- The Schmidt and Cece proposal
- The Weddings (Schmidt + Cece and Nick + Jess)
- Everybody finds out about Schmidt and Cece
- Nick, Jess and the landlord
- A Prince-and-Jess montage
- "Roar" slow motion fight scene
- "Because I Met You" speech
- Jess and Nick's first kiss
- Winston's search for a condom
Memorable Musical Moments: "Cotton-Eye Joe" at Cece's wedding & The Bollywood dance

What did you think about "The Curse of the Pirate Bride" & "Engram Pattersky"? How about the series as a whole? The Greatest Prank - too big or just right? Any favorite scenes, quotes or jokes? Feel free to let us know in the comments. And finally, thanks for reading!

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