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Castle - Child's Play - Review: "Mr. Castle"

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“You make sure you use your princess powers for good.” - Castle

This week Castle gets to infiltrate a second grade class, gets to play kindergarten cop in order to coerce the witness of a murder into confession. This actually sounds more interesting than it was. “Child’s Play” wasn’t without its moments, and I enjoyed it, but it just left me feeling nothing more than, okay. An Ice Cream Man gets killed in this episode of “Castle,” and when evidence comes to light, indicating that a second grader might know the identity of the killer, but won’t speak up, it’s up to Castle to earn their trust, get them to talk, to open up.

Mr. Castle gets to spend time with a class full of 8 year olds. He’s a child, one of them, what could possibly go wrong? Turns out, a lot could. At his entrance, he gets assaulted by a mob of 8 year olds, there was a moment where he rolled over marbles, another involving some wet pants and an embarrassing picture, then there was a game of Castle in the middle, which he lost. Halfway through the episode I was expecting him to go with an “I’m too old for this sh*t,” but no Castle is and will always remain a kid, he’ll never be too old, and he won’t give up that easily.

Maybe they missed the humour factor by a kilometre, but this episode certainly had a cuteness overload. Richard Castle playing princess with an 8 year old is adorable in anyone’s book, it is in my book at least. Infiltrating the group wasn’t as easy as he thought it would be, but he still manages to connect with some of the kids. He gets to play army in the grass, and have a tea party with a fellow princess, and it’s those moments that saved the episode.

“This girl, she’s ready to open up to me. We have… A special connection.”- Castle
“Really? Should I be worried?”- Beckett

There’s the little cutie, the one that’s jealous of Beckett and then there’s Jason, the loud, annoying bully. There’s always one, in every team, in every class. He’s Castle’s nemesis, been making his job harder, and of course he’s the witness, or knows who the witness is. We couldn’t see that one coming a mile away. They identify him after he slips a drawing of an ice cream truck in Castle’s pocket as he’s about to leave, but he still won’t talk, still won’t say what he knows. Beckett gets to play the good cop this once, and Richard Jerk Face Castle gets to be the bad-ish cop. She plays the kid like a violin, very well, and I loved it.

The murder of the ice cream man turns up not to be the murder of an ice cream man, because honestly, who would want to kill the ice cream man? It has something to do with an evil Russian man, Pokovnic, who could never be identified. No one knew what he looked like until the victim and his friends got glimpse of his information while making fake passports. He wants to protect his identity at all cost, and after killing dozens of people, it’s finally a jar of marbles that has the best of him.

At the loft, Alexis is serving hand and foot to her father, who's really mostly enjoying it. She’s cooking dinner, doing the dishes and running around town to buy his favorite kind of ice cream. (Am I the only one that thinks potato chips and fudge ice cream sounds really good? Maybe I am, but hey, I put peanut butter in my hamburgers, so what do I know?)


Beckett on the other hand, has alarm bells going off, because this isn’t normal, and it makes you wonder about Castle, who doesn’t see this behavior as unhealthy. I’m loving that we’re getting another glimpse in the Castle family dynamic, it’s been missing in the past season, and it’s putting Alexis in a different light, one where I can actually enjoy her character again. It’s finally when Alexis orders him home after school, that Castle realises he needs to acknowledge the problem. After realising she’s put a tracker apps on his phone, an app that Alexis flipped out over when he did in on her season 2-ish. (Again with the memory problems, here guys.)

I’m feeling like I’ve been harsh on that one, but it’s just that I was in love with the first three episodes of this seventh season, and I feel let down with this one. And I really hope, I’m not being too much of a Debbie Downer here, I tried to take the positive route.

Anyhow, here’s two Casltes on kick-scooters.

“I’m not too old for this, so you’re definitely not too old for this.” - Castle

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