SpoilerTV - TV Spoilers

Community - The Ass Crack Bandit song - Extended version


Real Neal here, signing off with the full version of a song that's been shooting up the request line faster than coins are dropping.



It said quarter to five
But it was quarter to ass
You thought your plumbing was safe
But your jeans were half-mast
Another coin down the drain
Now, that's some change that won't last

25¢ at a time he's taking our souls
Government men can't help, we're all alone
Are you feeling the breeze?
Did you pull your belt tight?
You know that it's wrong
You know that it's right

Out of the shadows, down the coin goes
Why, oh, why do you suppose?
Only the bandit knows

Whoa oh oh oh, oh whoa oh oh oh
A-s-s c-r-a-c-k bandit
Whoa oh oh oh, oh whoa oh oh oh
A-s-s c-r-a-c-k can't stand it

Coins on the sidewalk, coins in the palm of my hand
Coins in the ass crack or in the eyes of a dead man
Drawn from the shadows, quartered by fate
He's the Ass Crack Bandit, enemy of the state

Whoa oh oh oh, oh whoa oh oh oh
A-s-s c-r-a-c-k bandit
Whoa oh oh oh, oh whoa oh oh oh
A-s-s c-r-a-c-k can't stand it
Whoa oh oh oh, oh whoa oh oh oh
A-s-s c-r-a-c-k

He'll give you no quarter, but he'll... give you A quarter
Come on and just taste your change away

Maybe we are the crooks, and he's the hero
Maybe he's the Messiah, who is to say...

Save yourself a coin for the fairy man
Crossing the river, sticks off your ass
Wipe the smile from your face kids, 'cause this ain't funny
And don't forget your jukebox money!

Whoa oh oh oh, oh whoa oh oh oh
A-s-s c-r-a-c-k bandit
Whoa oh oh oh, oh whoa oh oh oh
A-s-s c-r-a-c-k can't stand it

Can't stand the fear,
Can't stand not knowing,
Can't stand forever,
Eventually we all bend over

In the end, we all bend over
In the end, we all bend over

Your brothers, your sisters, they all bend over
Your friends and enemies, they all bend over
You and me, we all bend over
We all bend over...


#onemoreseasonandamovie

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