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Hawaii Five-0 - Makaukau 'ce e Pa'ani? (Season Premiere) - Review: "You're Welcome"

24 Sept 2016

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"You're Welcome" means several things in the season premiere of Hawaii Five-0. For Steve and Danny, who are both recovering from the events of last season, it is an unspoken (or, pretty much spoken by the end) bond. Danny gave part of his liver to Steve and the two, despite the wheelchair races and the usual bickering, haven't really emotionally processed this.

After beginning with Steve reopening his wounds chasing an unknown suspect, we flash back to Steve searching for some guidance in the hospital chapel. I have transcribed my thought process of the chapel scene below:

There are a lot of candles in this chapel... who lights them?... this is a nice moment ... WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?

There's bad CGI and then there's bad CGI. And then there's Lovecraftian-abomination-level digital rendering.

I understand and value the sentiment, I really do. At a crucial moment in his life, Steve goes to the chapel and seeks advice, only to receive it in the form of another Steve - a CGI Jack Lord. Seeing another version of himself, happily married and content, brings him peace. It is sweet and shows the writers' commitment to celebrating the history of the franchise. The CGI was just... very disconcerting. I wouldn't have been that surprised if the serial killer was performing some sort of black magic blood ritual to keep the original zombie Steve mobile and terrifying.

Aside from the strange chapel scene, the show lapsed back into its regular routine quite quickly. It focused on the emotional fallout from last season and Danny's concern for Steve. Danny isn't the most gracious organ donor in the world and it only takes a little while into the investigation before Danny is throwing around the "organ donation" card to nag Steve into taking better case of himself. The two bicker about it, with Danny unable to articulate his actual concern for his partner and what he sees are unnecessary risks. They finally talk it out, with Danny telling Steve that he needs to take it easy and Steve finally compromising at the end (no hot wings, just straight home for a nap).


In the other character-driven side-plot, Chin is trying to make a home for Sara, but gets news from Child Services that her newly found aunt and uncle are filing adoption papers. He does his own background check on the two, but hasn't gotten the results yet.


Then there's the other meaning of "You're Welcome" - written in blood by a serial killer who wants nothing more than to help the Five-0 team out. First, they find an asphyxiated body in their offices with a rare chess piece jammed into his mouth. The body is identified as Hein, a burgeoning serial killer who managed to kill six tourists before anyone noticed them missing. The details of Hein's pasttime aren't really important to the plot. All it means is that someone out there is a better detective than the Five-0 and the Governor is PISSED.

When another serial killer's body turns up and the aforementioned message is scrawled on his horror house's garage door, the team realizes it is the work of a serial killer of serial killers. He leaves pawns in his victim's mouths. The clues lead them to a very sketchy guy who happened to be the main suspect in the disappearance of a couple who owned that exact chess set.

Danny and Steve find an abducted woman in the guy's apartment and the guy spectacularly jumps through a window and leads the team on an epic parkour chase through the city.


The chase is amazingly choreographed and shot. It really made me appreciate all the effort that must have gone into creating such a seamless action sequence. Steve, Chin, and Kono all get their turn chasing the baddie up and down buildings.


It ends with them smoking him out of a hotel, him trying to jump to the next building, and him falling to his death (as stunning as that chase was - and it was stunning - the graphics for the fall are Jack Lord zombie bad). Steve reopened his wounds in the chase (as we saw in the opener), but everyone ends up ok. For some reason, even though that guy seemed like your garden-variety, parkour loving rapist scumbag and not some evil mastermind, the team decides he was behind all the chess piece killings, that there is no need to investigate anything further, and that they should go for a celebratory beer (and hot wings for the non-drinking Danny). Steve decides to follow Danny's advice and actually goes back to his house to rest. There, he discovers another chess piece, starting what will be a recurring arc throughout the new season.

To me, the chess piece Steve receives looks like a knight, which might mean that the serial killer isn't just using his victims as pawns, but the team as his own personal pieces in a twisted game.

There's a lot to look forward to in this new season. The show will celebrate its 150th episode with guest stars that will tie up some loose ends. Next week, we'll get an international spy caper. A new profiler will be brought in to help with the serial killer. So, I look forward to spending some time in Hawaii with you all!

Let me know what you think about tonight's episode in the comments!

About the Author - Laurel Weibezahn
Laurel Weibezahn is a freelance writer. She lives in the Pacific Northwest.
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