SpoilerTV - TV Spoilers

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The end of the official 2013-2014 TV season is upon us and last week we got confirmation about whether our favorite TV shows would be returning or not. It's always a time of mixed glee and sadness. Sometimes it evokes anger that good shows die while trashy, poorly written ones continue. Let's face it, everyone rails at Nielsen viewers for their sometimes crummy taste. Here's my TV score card. Don't forget to share yours in the comments below. Also as always, if you have a show to nominate feel free. I will be doing special summer marathon watches to buff up my summer viewing so I'm looking for shows to stream.


TV Score Card:

Show I Will Miss Most - Enlisted, Surviving Jack, Star-Crossed, Almost Human,

Shows I Will Miss - The Crazy Ones, Community, Growing Up Fisher, Welcome to the Family, Warehouse 13, Trophy Wife

Shows I'm Excited are Coming Back - Sleepy Hollow, Teen Wolf, The Goldbergs, The 100, White Collar

Shows I am Glad are coming Back - Agents of SHIELD, Resurrection, Elementary, Grimm, The Blacklist






Overall Awards -


Most Missed - Enlisted and Surviving Jack

Generally at the end of renewals/cancellations, I am mourning at least one drama. I rarely have much feeling about the comedies at all. This season changed all that with the rise of many family oriented comedies in a raunchy adults-only comedy world. So it is with great sadness that I say goodbye to two of my favorite shows this season: Enlisted and Surviving Jack. Both knew how to deliver great laughs from the gut as well as add those moments of genuine heart that made me care about the characters. I found myself connecting with those characters on a deeper level than most of the new dramas, which is hard to do in half the time. So thanks cast and crew of Enlisted and Surviving Jack for giving me something to look forward to each week. I knew that when I watched my mood would be lightened and I would come away from the show feeling better as a person. I'm sorry that the Nielsen viewers didn't realize what gems you were because you deserved a long life of making people laugh. I'll miss you both.


Best Episode - Surviving Jack - 1.07 - 
Parents Just Don't Understand (series finale)

One of the things I am going to miss most about Surviving Jack is seeing two strong people committed to each other in marriage. It's a rare gift on TV to actually feel like the spouses treasure each other and to laugh not at each other's expense but with each other and at life. The moment where Jack holds Joanne while she questions if she has done enough for her children is touching even if it is brief. It's a universal mom worry and he handles it amazingly well. This episode about conflicting parenting styles could have gone off the rails quickly, but in the end it gave us more clarity into the characters while poking fun at extremes. Nothing made me laugh harder than how each of them reacted to the stoners. I will also miss Jack's ability to tell it like it is. He sugarcoats nothing and has a refreshingly cavalier attitude towards his kids. I envy him that ability. Who doesn't want to be perfectly blunt with kids at times? He made me laugh harder than all the characters on The Big Bang Theory put together. Add in a perfect 16 Candles reference and Frankie's declaration at the end and this episode is about as perfect a comedy as you can ask for. This show might be cancelled but that doesn't mean you shouldn't check it out. You won't be sorry you did.


Best New Show - 24: Live Another Day

Confession time - I left the original 24 sometime in the season when the cougar did NOT eat Kim. I have never regretted that decision. Therefore I start this new version almost like a newbie. I don't know who most of the characters are nor their complicated back story. Mostly I remember that it was hard to distinguish the good guys from the bad guys since they all acted the same way and there was more melodrama than any one action thriller should have. I mean his lover ended up trying to kill his wife, every sane audience member wanted to kill his daughter, and there's no way one man could go through all of that in 24 hours. Much less several times. Therefore I was shocked by how much I enjoyed the pilot despite not having one iota of a clue as to what was going on. I don't know any of these people except Jack and Chloe and I have no idea what they have been up to, but man do I want to know who took over the drone and what that has to do with Jack. It's likely my fervor will cool as the plot gets more farfetched and Jack gets douchier, as is par for the series, but right now I'm glad there's a cool new action show on TV. There's nothing like a fast paced plot filled with gunfire and explosions that also has a 90% chance of actually going somewhere to whet my TV appetite. The second episode wasn't quite as good as the first for me but it still filled the Burn Notice-shaped hole in my TV schedule, even if I don't like the characters as much.


Most Improved Character - Elementary - Mycroft

Like Tom Keen on The Blacklist before him, I often overlooked Mycroft as a somewhat interesting piece of fluff floating around the peripheral of the real story. I never hated him for sleeping with Joan like a lot of fans, but I didn't really get excited when I learned he was coming back. He was simply there. Oh how have the last few episodes changed everything. From wanting him to leave to stop the hinted at love triangle to begging for him to stay because he's currently the most interesting character on the show, my feeling for Mycroft have run the gamut. I love that he has been revealed as working with MI-6. I love even more that Sherlock didn't have a clue and that Mycroft is calling him on being an arrogant prick. Mostly though he intrigues me because I have no idea what side of him is the truth. Did he really re-join British Intelligence to keep Sherlock from prison? Could the twist be that he really is the mole and is running both Sherlock and Watson a merry game? I have no idea and that rarely happens in TV. I love it. Now sure, both of the Holmes brothers need to grow up and I often have a desire to knock their heads together, but I cannot wait to see how this finale pans out because Mycroft is the greatest mystery of this crime show.


Nominated/New Shows - 


Nominated Shows: Blue Bloods - 1.01 - Pilot

I have watched a lot of police procedurals and oft times they run together. Over the years I have dropped most because there doesn't seem like a lot of urgency in them. In many ways Blue Bloods is the same. You've got your hothead detective that doesn't play by the rules but gets results. There's the wise old patriarch, although this time there's two of them. Also included is a hotshot young DA who is often at counter purposes to the police and a young recruit determined to live up to the family name. The only big difference is that these guys are all related, which makes family dinner tense. It is also has a core mystery surrounding a dead loved one that drives one of the cops. As clichéd as that sounds, it is tempered by the fact that his family might be part of the organization that killed him. That increases the urgency enough to be intriguing. I'm not sure I have time to add another police procedural to my plate this summer, but I was left wanting more from the pilot and that's always a good thing.

Grade: B-
Ranking: 3

Best Scene - extraditing the criminal to Florida because they screwed up the bust in NYC

Best Quote - Frank: "No strangling on Sunday, okay sunshine?"

Best Reason to Watch - While it seems like a typical police procedural, asking a new recruit to spy on his powerful cop family to find out about a secret society working within the force is an intriguing twist

Best Juxtaposition - Commissioner welcoming new NYPD recruits to the force while a little girl is kidnapped

Best Reason to Not Go into Blogging or Journalism as a Career - the doll reviewer's posh living quarters with the rats

Least Surprising - The kidnapped girl also has a medical condition that makes it even more imperative to find her right away / the Mayor is a political douche / the head detective is a bigger douche who gets the job done breaking one law at a time

Most Surprising - the newest cop in the family is a Harvard grad lawyer. That's quite some job transition.

The "Are You Sure It's Not Thanksgiving" Award - Sunday dinners at the Reagans are brutal. I have no idea why they all shows up.

Best Instant Suspect Pool Reduction - What kidnapper uses a prototype doll that is only in limited sale while committing the crime? New York's Dumbest?

Best Twist - the fallen cop brother was undercover in a sting to take down a corrupt cop secret society. Say what? It's all da Vinci code meets police procedural.



New Show - 24: Live Another Day - 
(11:06 am - noon) / (noon - 1)

Grade: A-
Rank: 5 (for now)

Best Scene - Jack breaks Chloe out of the cell with a little help from his friend colleague?

Best Quote - Adrian: "You can thank me by leaving and never coming back." / Belcheck: "I thought you said she was a friend." Jack: "I don't have any friends. Let's go."

Best Reason to Watch - The action is awesome and nothing in the story dragged.

Biggest Brat - Ritter, whose jealousy and whining makes me think he's not competent for any job much less his big promotion

The "Ho Hum" Award - The president has Alzheimer's or something similar, giving control to his shady son-in-law. This subplot is a snoozer as it's been done over and over again.

The "Hey, It's That Guy" Award - Gbenga Akinnagbe is playing Erik Ritter, but I know him best as bad guy Bello on Graceland. Even better Benjamin Bratt is back on my screen. How are you doing, Detective Curtis? Better still my beloved Walter from Arrow has a role that will hopefully appreciate him more. Wait, is that Lady Macbeth Neville from Revolution I see. I love that snake in the grass. And speaking of snakes, there's Keller from White Collar, my second favorite villain on the show. Oh and there's the lady from Chuck, but since I only saw season 1 of Chuck that means much less to me than many shows.

Best Reason to Not Mind Growing Older - Jack Bauer can still kick major butt, even those who are half his age

Best Reaction - Tanner when he watches his drone get taken over and target Sheppard

The Nepotism Award - When your father-in-law is the President of the United States, it's not at all suspicious when you are the chief of staff.

The Explosion Countdown - It took until 34:55 for the first explosion. I'm guessing it'll take less time as the day unfolds.

The "Way to Betray a Friend" award - I know Jack said he has no friends, but what he did to Chloe was beneath the belt

Least/Biggest Surprise - No surprise that Hooker Girlfriend is actually after the hacking device, but I wasn't prepared for her to be the buyer's daughter. Nothing like pimping out your kid.



Weekly Shows - 

The Big Bang Theory - I didn't have time to watch this week, so I will review both next week.  Sorry.


TURN - 1.04 - Eternity How Long / 1.05 - Epiphany

Since I wasn't able to get to TURN last week, today I am reviewing both of these together. I found that I liked 1.04 much better than 1.05, mostly because the latter had the ultra annoying tryst between Abraham and Anna. Plus I thought that Eternity How Long was better paced and overall more interesting. I especially liked the father and son scenes. Their relationship is complicated but always fascinating. As for the second episode, I was delighted to see Aldis Hodge back on my screen. I had no idea he was in this show and I hope to see a lot more of him. I can't wait until my annual rewatch of Leverage this summer so it's nice to see him before that to whet my appetite. I also thought it was a brilliant ploy to give Ben and Caleb a reason to miss the battle (and thus the budget expense of shooting it) and their burgeoning friendship has been one of my favorites. They always bring the humor if not always the common sense. Another bright spot was Abraham's knowledge really helping and the introduction of George Washington to the show. I am very much enjoying this show, except for the insistence on adultery. If we could skip that, TURN would be one of my favorite new shows.

Grade - B+ / C

Best Scene - Abe watches as his father removes his brother's headstone

Best Quote - Caleb: "Yeah well, insubordination's your best quality." / Abigail: "Protect my boy in Setauket and I'll do your laundry in New York."

Best Reason to Watch - Abe and his father working together on a problem instead of at loggerheads / Caleb and Ben's camaraderie

Best Reason to Fast Forward - Abraham and Anna

Best Surprise - Aldis Hodge. I am so glad to see him again even if he is kind of douchey in this one.

Best Addition - Abigail, who I am glad is going to tie the Major Andre story line together

Best Character Interaction - Abraham and his father / Caleb and Ben

Most Gullible - Mary Woodhull allows herself to be tricked into telling the Judge's secret, therefore tarnishing her character even more in favor of Anna. Bah!

Worst Bait and Switch - saying the slaves will be free but then commandeering their services so that they are slaves still

Best Show of Loyalty - Abraham stands up against the crowd for his father who is in a difficult situation

Biggest Aww Scene - The Woodhull family gathers around the tombstone of Thomas

Best Acting - Philomena, who sounds like she is being tortured as she wins a hand in cards

Least Politically Correct - Hewlett decides to use tombstones to shield his canons over Judge Woodhull's protestations

Most Crafty (British) - Andre plays Conroy like a pro

Most Crafty (Patriots) - Caleb and Ben get Abe's info to Washington despite Scott's protests

Best Cameo - General George Washington

Least Surprising - Judge Woodhull digs up his son's grave to lead by example

The "My Have You Grown Bold" Award - Abraham rifles through the officer's things to write his own ticket into New York

Best Interruption - The British soldier stops Abraham and Anna from screwing and I am more grateful to him than any other character on TV this week.

Most Fun - the decoy party



Resurrection - 1.07 - Schemes of the Devil / 1.08 - Torn Apart (Season Finale)

While we end Resurrection season 1 with still no answers, it has picked up the pace with the inclusion of the government and of course, quarantine. I have no idea why they needed to make Sheriff insane though. I liked him as a good guy and quite frankly Arcadia is way over the normal quota for crazy anyway. They don't need any more nut jobs. Overall this series has kept my attention and I'm not as frustrated by a lack of answers as I am in some shows. I'll definitely be picking it back up in season 2.

Grade - B- / B+

Best Silent Scene - Sheriff and Maggie break down over the fact that his wife did not return to them when everyone else seems to be

Best Quote - Sheriff: "So breakfast with my big brother. What'd I do wrong this time?"

Best Reason to Watch - The government is now involved and it's going to get science experiment-y from now.

Biggest Douche - Pick a character, any character. Chances are they were a douche in one of these two episodes. Elaine, Henry, and Lu are notable exceptions.

The "Are You Insane?" Award - Tom seriously takes his mistress to where his wife is staying and asks her to help? Are you kidding me?

The "It's about Time" Award - Finally news about the returned gets out. It wasn't realistic that in the internet age this wouldn't have leaked out in the first 24 hours much less a whole week.

Best Job in Arcadia - Motel owner. There's a lot of people who need beds these days.

The "Say What?" Award - The resurrected's blood can cure cancer? Really?

Best Twist - Bellamy is the returned's son, Robert

Pet Peeve - Why, oh why is Rachel back? We finally got rid of her tired plot line. It's bad enough when sci fi/fantasy shows raise people from the dead a few seasons later because they realized they made a mistake. It's much worse when they cannot die period. There are no stakes in the drama if people keep popping up. Now I know the whole premise of the show is resurrection, hence the title. However, I have no reason to get concerned about any of these resurrected if they can be shot and be back 30 seconds later. Not unless one of them gets beheaded. This show could be fun with a little Sleepy Hollow or Nearly Headless Nick action.

The "Oh No, They Didn't" Award - They went and made the sheriff crazy. I was hoping he would be the glue that held everything together.



Star-Crossed - 1.12 - This Trick May Chance to Scathe You

It's all about girl power tonight. Teri takes out Castor through treachery and a poisoned knife. Emery takes down the Trag with pepper spray. Sophia is the linchpin for getting the Trags to move the bomb. Woo hoo all the way around. The only downside to this female awesomeness is the return of Zoe. Seriously, can no one stay dead on this show? Other than that and a few moments of blah, this was one rocking episode. There are no words for how sad it is that this show that was better than it ever deserved to be never found an audience while other drek keeps getting renewed. I'll miss you after next week Star-Crossed but you have been one exhilarating ride.

Grade - A-

Best Scene - The group working together to defeat the Trags and get the bomb out

Best Quote - Grayson: "Well nothing says unity like trying to dismantle an Atrian terrorist plot together."

Best Reason to Watch - Things are getting intense around here and the stakes are high. The fast-paced plot is the best thing about this particular episode.

Best Reason to Fast Forward - Surprise, it's not Roman and Emery's tortured romance this week. It ran a close second to the complete ick of Teri and Castor flirting with each other. He could be her dad. Gross!

Biggest Aww Scene - Saroya asks Drake to stay for just a little while before she leaves him again.

The "You Go Girl" Award - Emery finally takes care of herself by pepper spraying the Trag. I've never liked her better than this moment.

Least Stealthy - Roman and Drake who are jumping down on catwalks right above the totally deaf Trags

Least Likely Alliance - Drake tells Grayson about the Trag bomb

Most Unlikely - Mardi Gras to the rescue. I've heard of Mardi Gras causing quite a few problems, but never it preventing a war. Pink Atrian elephant floats make a nice cover.

The "Are You Brain Dead?" Award - Emery, you and Roman broke up to help consolidate support for him in the Sector. Do you really think that traipsing around by his side is going to help that goal? / Roman and Grayson, when tailing someone you should probably not be talking about terrorist acts in the middle of a crowded market. Seriously people. Go watch Burn Notice and then attempt to do surveillance.

Least Surprising - Drake's mom takes him out in order to protect him but then Drake talks her into letting him go by appealing to her sense of honor and motherhood.

Biggest Understatement - Emery: "That's not our only problem." Nope, the Sector is just full of them. I count 3 likely ways you all die: Trag, Castor, or bomb.



Blacklist - 1.21 - Berlin

In all honesty, I will probably drop this show in season 2 and wait until hiatus to marathon it. The "stockpiling questions and never revealing answers" type of storytelling is beyond frustrating for me. Generally it means the writers have no clue where they are going. However, I intend to enjoy the ride to finale. This episode was interesting. I never thought of using biological weapons as blackmail but it makes a twisted sort of sense. Plus, this is the first time I've seen it used in a police procedural, so it has a sense of novelty as a plot twist as well. In addition, we got a Tom scene, which is always a plus these days - just maybe hold back on the flaying people, okay?

Grade - B+

Best Scene - mental institution

Best Quote - Tom: "Are you a killer, Jesse? I sure hope you are a killer because I don't think you have a future in surveillance."

Best Reason to Watch - While there are zero answers on the most pressing questions, we may get answers on who Berlin is and why he/she wants Red dead

Biggest Idiot - the EMT who tells everyone that the man is infected without taking precautions for people panicking first. Have you not been trained in this kind of thing? Argh!

Best Addition - Dr. Sanders. I hope he comes back. He's kooky fun and obviously devoted to virology.

The "Shut Up" Award - I know where you are coming from but please for the love of my entertainment, SHUT UP, Keen! It's no fun listening to you harp every 30 seconds and badgering a poor guy in a mental hospital just makes me want to smack you.

Most Well Played - Elizabeth uses the same tactic on the doctor as he used on his victims

Biggest Forward Movement - Keen tells the FBI about her husband / Berlin has come to town

Least Surprising - Keen's proclamation to never speak to Red again lasts approximately 13.4 seconds and at the end she reluctantly agrees to continue working with him to find answers. (Good luck with that. I don't think the writers have any for you.)



Warehouse 13 - 5.04 - Savage Seduction

I might have come into this episode with too high expectations. The cast raved about how it was the funniest thing they have ever done, and it probably was for most fans. I however tend to not like the high melodramas even when done for comedic effect. I found the overacting absurd even if it was intentional and I missed time with the characters I know and love. With only 6 episodes this season, I want to spend as much time with them, as possible. Not with alternative realities of them.

Grade: C+

Best Scene - Artie tells Claudia that Claire is missing

Best Quote - Artie: "Sometimes people fill a void with an obsessive attachment to a TV show." Pete: "Hey, I watch Breaking Amish because I like it. Hey, I can quit any time."

Best Reason to Watch - I now know for sure that telenovellas are not for me. Way too much melodrama up in there.

Best Reason to Count to 9 - Confirm that you could not possibly have knocked someone up, especially if you haven't seen them for 2 years.

Best Reason to Fast Forward - the end. I liked it better when they ended with telenovella mom saying Myka and Pete were brother and sister because before this mess of a season they were.

Best Moment - Steve comes running in because Artie sounds like it's an emergency but it's only another job / Claudia punches out the frat boy

Best Meta - talking about the passion fans have for a canceled show when WH13 is almost canceled itself

Biggest Surprise - Steve was in a fraternity. My shock is tempered by their book and a cappella clubs

The "It's So Sad It's Now Funny" Award - the blatant Prius commercials written into the character's dialogue used to be annoying but now they just make me laugh and shake my head

Biggest Laugh - Pete channeling his inner Zelda Rubinstein via Poltergeist

The "This Episode is Brought to You by Pantene" Award - With all the hair blowing, I'm surprised they didn't pan in on a shampoo in this episode.

The "Ouch" Award - It only took 1 day for Kelly's grandma to forget the canceled show and find a new favorite



Growing Up Fisher - 1.11 - Secret Lives of Fishers

Another heartwarming comedy cancelled in favor of the raunchy. I weep for America. While I won't miss Growing Up Fisher as much as say Enlisted, I have enjoyed watching the story unfold. Joyce is far more watchable than at first and it's always good to see Mel struggle a little. Still I'll miss Katie and Henry the most. They remind me of times with my younger brother.

Grade - B-

Best Scene - Joyce plays tub-side therapist to an stressed out Mel

Best Quote - Joyce: "Anyway, I've got 3 hours to kill. What should I see?" Owen: "A therapist."

Best Reason to Watch - we've all been in the same situation so watching it on screen is kind of therapeutic, even without Joyce's tub-side advice

The "Hmm" Award - I didn't know anyone whose parents said they couldn't get a job in high school. Most parents I knew wanted them to have part-time job to teach responsibility…and to pay for their own junk.

The "Oh Poor Baby" Award - Owen, the movie ticket guy who has to listen to Joyce's midlife crisis

The "What Kind of College Kids are These?" Award - Who doesn't know what grade they are getting in college before the grades are posted. Can these people not do the math? That's sad.

The "You're Totally Screwed" Award - when your little brother has this much good dirt on you, you really have no chance. Pay now and get in trouble later.

The "Better Rule of Thumb" Award - No working with your significant other, especially if you are a teen. Unless you want the relationship to end badly. Then by all means.

The "Revolving Door of Lies" Award / The "Hey I Could be a Voice Over" Award - to all the Fishers. Everyone's so caught up on hiding their own stuff that they don't see how transparent everyone else's lies are. Apparently the voice over also thought this because as soon as I typed it, the voice over said it.

The "Way to Go Mom" Award - Joyce does a great job of making herself unattractive to get the 8th graders to back off Henry. I think she had an orange in her teeth.



SHIELD - 1.21 - Ragtag

Agents of SHIELD continues to get better as we march to the season finale. I love how we got back story on both Ward and Garrett although I would like to know more about Ward than we got. I'm also looking forward to Garrett getting his butt kicked but good next episode. It better happen. Mostly though I like having SHIELD as the underdog, working with ancient tools and having to rely on their own wits and each other. Going low-tech is actually more fun than I thought it would be. The only thing I hope for is a redemption arc for Ward, because I would miss him next season if he doesn't get one. Have no idea how they could realistically do that though. It's not like he can rejoin the team. Perhaps he will have to take over for Garrett as the main bad guy instead.

Grade - A-

Best Scene - Ward ejects Fitz and Simmons from the plane because caring for them is a weakness

Best Quote - Coulson: "I don't know if I've said it enough, but I'm glad you're back."

Best Reason to Watch - Ward and Garrett back story

Best Moves in a Hallway - May, who does gymnastics down it before knocking the guy out

The "Hmm" Award - For some reason I thought Grant Ward was an alias. Not sure why. I never saw him as a pyro either.

Biggest Answers - Garrett is the first Deathlocke and his equipment is malfunctioning

Most Impressive - Fitz and Simmons can lift the file cabinet that Coulson threw out the window as a file transfer like its nothing. To quote Dean, "Maybe you have a little more upper body strength than I gave you credit for."

Biggest Kids - Coulson and Trip geeking out over the old time spy gear

It's Our Annual Dose of How Awesome Skye Is - Coulson tells Skye that she isn't weak but that her heart is filled with compassion, which shows the true moral fiber of her character and proves how strong she is.

Biggest Woo Hoo - Coulson is no longer being a douche to May / Fitz is no longer being a douche to Trip

The "I ALMOST Feel Sorry for You" Award - Ward has a ticked off May on his butt. Not at all the position I'd want to be in.

Most Chutzpah - Fitz who demands the return of the plane and fries up Garrett a bit

Biggest Laugh - Fitz sets the curtains on fire with said spy gear

Biggest Ouch - The CyberTek people pretty much called Fitz and Simmons' inventions outdated and uncreative.

The "Hey, I'm Right There with You Buddy" award - You keep dreaming that Ward is not a bad guy, Fitz. I'll believe with you too. Maybe if we clap our hands we can get him back.

Biggest Douche / Most in Need of Dying - I knew you were going to make Ward kill his dog, Garrett, from the second you left it with him and I still want to kick your butt for it. You big douche!



The Goldbergs - 1.22 - A Wrestler Named Goldberg

Only one of my favorite comedies this year made it to a season 2 and it was this one. Since it is also my favorite comedy it mitigates the sting. The Goldbergs is a great combo of laughs and heart and this was a great example. Whether it was Murray talking down Beverly or Adam and Erica enjoying the new Star Wars movie, there is something in this episode for everyone. It's a relief that a good family comedy can make it in the sewer of raunchy comedies these days.

Grade - A-

Best Moment - Coach stops a overly excited Barry from taking a chair to a kid's head

Best Quote - Barry: "Who are these people? Tragedy befalls all of them and I have no idea who they are."

Best Aww Scene - Erica dresses up like Princess Leia and takes Adam to the movie

Worst Parenting - Beverly embarrasses Barry in front of the whole school. Some conversations you have in private. Some conversations you only have in your own mind.

Biggest Nostalgia - I remember all the hype over Return of the Jedi. It was an amazing movie when I was a kid. Still a pretty good one now. Hey, I like the Ewoks.

Worst Nostalgia - Wrestling mania. I had to live through that once. Never again.

Best Return - Coach of the Presidential Fitness Award episode. I love this guy. He cracks me up with his communism invasion fear.

The "Say What?" Award - We already had a big episode in which Barry is a noted hockey star. Now Beverly is saying no to hockey, which Barry and Murray bond over. I think someone forgot their own canon in order to create this episode. Sigh.

Biggest Manipulator - Nope, not Beverly. This episode belongs to Adam for manipulating Erica into camping out for Star Wars tickets. Although Murray gets bonus points for saying Barry can't do the play to make Beverly all for it.

The "Time Served: Award - Barry gets caught lying to Beverly but he's already served his time by having to run Annie songs with his mom.

Best Music - Final Countdown



Trophy Wife - 1.21 - Back to School

While I could have done without both the reunion and the babysitting storylines, each did bring something to the show. The reunion gave me my new phrase, "Just clear your crazy with me first next time, okay?" Bwah! Awesome! It also had a great scene in which Kate reaffirms Jackie. The babysitting had…yeah, it really didn't have anything I'm excited about but if you're into burping, this is the episode for you. Mostly I enjoyed the college road trip. I have no idea why Warren is completely stupid these days and I don't buy for one minute that Diane would let her son slack in his grades, but it contained much of the heart. I also like that Hillary was knocked down a peg or two. Sometimes we all have to be reminded that we aren't the smartest cookie in the batch.

Grade - B

Best Scene - Warren cheers up Hillary at college

Best Quote - Kate: "Just clear your crazy with me first next time, okay?"

Best Reason to Watch - Everyone helping each other see that it's okay to be themselves because they are pretty great on their own

The "Say What?" Award - I could have sworn that Warren was super smart in the first few episodes. What happened?

Best Plan - Putting Burt in charge of Meg and Tevin, who often act younger than he does

Biggest Ouch - Hillary finds out that she's not the smartest person in the room for the first time

Favorite Moment - Warren covers Hillary's eyes during the rough pars of the movie



The 100 - 1.08 - Day Trip

What happens when an entire camp of teenagers get high from toxic berries? Love triangles blossom into quartets, people die, star-crossed lovers are parted, and Monty and Jasper become comic relief again. Only one of those things is positive. I do love comedy in my dramas. Other than that, the stakes are raised by bringing guns into the mix and I expect it to complicate things for the worst instead of making anything better. I'm with Finn on this one but it does make for more compelling situations with long-reaching ramifications. Speaking of Finn, of all the characters being undermined by love shenanigans, he's been shafted the most. Talk about taking a formerly interesting character whom people took seriously and then flushing him down the shipping abyss. Finn is about as interesting as toilet paper these days and far less useful. Raven is a close second, which is a great shame because her character had the most potential. I would also argue that Clarke and Bellamy have become less interesting too. Their conflict used to be the best thing about The 100. Now they are agreeing more often and turning schmoopier. The Ark has been far more interesting in the last few episodes so I can't wait until they descend on earth and relegate all this to the "D" storyline with just as little time as possible.

Grade - B-

Best Scene - Jaha pardons Bellamy. That storyline is no longer hanging over our head so we can stop pretending that Bellamy is going anywhere.

Best Quote - Monty: "I'd like to give earth a giant hug."

Best Reason to Watch - upping the stakes by finding the guns. This is going to go badly fast.

Best Reason to Fast Forward - always shipping. Always!

Best Moment - Clarke flat out tells Jaha that they sent the 100 to earth to die and effectively turns the tables on him. She'll make a great politician someday.

Best Buddies - Monty and Jasper, who make me laugh at the simple things

The "Somehow I Don't Think That's What She Meant" Award - Pretty sure when Clarke said that Finn should stay in bed to rest, she didn't mean Raven should crawl on top of him and start making out

Biggest Miss - I thought we were going to see Clarke finally talk to Abby but it was not meant to be this week. I blame all the freaking shipper scenes. Here's to next week.

Best Hallucination (Seen) - Bellamy surrounded by the 320 people who sacrificed themselves for the Ark

Best Hallucination (Not Seen) - Whatever Monty was seeing because he was the happiest of them all



Elementary - 2.23 - Art in the Blood

I have to say that Mycroft is rapidly becoming the most interesting character on Elementary, Moriarty aside of course. He's the primary reason why this episode was such a high point for me. Sherlock, on the other hand, was a low point. Here's hoping that changes in the finale. This last series of episodes has done a great job of invigorating the show, taking it away from the typical case of the week procedural that sometimes gets Elementary lost in the shuffle. I'd love to see them do more multi-episode cases in the future.

Grade - B+

Best Scene - Joan tells Sherlock she's moving out / Mycroft explains why he returned to MI-6

Best Quote - Sherlock: "But we are what we do." Watson: "No, you are what you do. You have to be to be happy. I don't."

Best Reason to Watch - Mycroft has gotten more and more interesting every episode and it's all building to crescendo now

Biggest Aww - Sherlock offers to talk about Moriarty's betrayal if it will help Watson with Mycroft

The "Shut Up" Award - Sherlock, who comes off as a smug douche. I'm glad Mycroft stopped his ranting and told him what's what. Then later on Marion calls him on his double standard. Good!

Biggest Leap - Invisible tattoos instead of something like biometrics

Best Brother…Maybe - Mycroft took up a job he hated again to save Sherlock. If it is true, he is the best of all brothers. If it is not, he's the most manipulative assassin around.

Least Surprising - MI-6 offers Sherlock a job. I'm quite frankly surprised they didn't do so long before this.

Biggest Surprise - Sherlock thinks Mycroft is being framed instead of immediately thinking the worst of him

The "Grow Up" Award - both Holmes brothers, who are babyish and trying to one up each other the entire episode. Quite annoying indeed.

Best Meta - Mycroft lives in Apartment 12B



Surviving Jack - 1.07 - Parents Just Don't Understand (series finale)

Grade - A

Best Scene - Jack reassures Joanne about her parenting and then Frankie tells his parents he loves them

Best Quote - Jack: "I don't want to be around our kids 24 hours a day. I'd rather wait until I die to go to hell."

Best Reason to Watch - the conflicting parenting styles of Joanne and Jack

Best Reference Ever - Drunk George falls out of the tree like Long Duk Dong in 16 Candles

Funniest Moment - Jack and the stoners and then Joanne and the stoners

Biggest Awww Moment - George hugs Mikey after he tells them that his dad has left for good

The "Say What?" Award - Jack says they have to trust their kids while Joanne says to protect them from themselves. It seems like they are each on the wrong end of this argument given their personalities.

Dumbest Plan Ever - Practice drinking for your first alcoholic party

Best Physical Comedy - George dancing

Most Outwitted - Joanne, who gets sacked by Rachel into agreeing to let her on the pill

Most Unique Way to Keep Kids from Alcohol - hit them with balls from a pitching machine

Best Music - Stand by REM / What's Up by Four Non Blondes

Worst Music - Funky Cold Medina by Tone Loc, which got old after 2 months of continual airplay. However, I admit that it was a great choice for song-to-scene.



Grimm - 3.21 - The Inheritance

Grimm continues to fascinate here at the end, thanks to Teen Grimm. She's outsmarting and outfighting everyone else on the show put together. I know I say this a lot but they really need a spin-off with her and Mama Grimm. They would rock together - a Grimm version of Ellen and Jo from Supernatural. I was sorry to see Old Man Grimm bite it so fast and even more so when he didn't manage to spit out where the key was. Dying people really need to start prioritizing their final speeches. It's irksome. However getting back to the original key conspiracy is all worth it. Looks like the end of this season is going to go out with quite a punch!

Grade - A-

Best Scene - Hospital parking lot fight

Best Quote - Josh: "Well at least I know my dad wasn't crazy…unless all of you are."

Best Reason to Watch - Teen Grimm. Always Teen Grimm.

Best Reaction - The Grimm Gang to Josh wondering if they are all crazy

Fight Winner - Once again Teen Grimm takes the prize in the hospital parking lot fight. The girl has skills.

Most Depressing Dinner Conversation - Teen Grimm's life was a fairy tale. You know that first part where everything is hell and you're waiting for the fairy godmother. Instead she got Grimm-ed. Your story sucks, Teen Grimm. I'd demand a rewrite.

Biggest Congrats - Juliette has stepped up from Research Woman to wedding planner. Yea, job promotion.

Biggest Slam - Renard: "If I didn't know you better, I'd be in love with you."

Most Pragmatic - Teen Grimm turns down a shopping trip with Juliette because she doesn't want to get used to this life. I still think Mama Grimm's Home for Wayward Infants could use a little Teen Grimm.

Biggest Idiot - Why is Adalind scheming about Juliette when Renard is there? She's not even going to get to the villain monologue if she keeps being so inept. / Renard for sleeping with the enemy

Plot Device #1 - Nick conveniently leaves his phone at his desk right when Teen Grimm calls him about Old Man Grimm

Plot Device #2 - And most annoying of all, Old Man Grimm dies before he can tell Nick where the key is. ARGHHHHHH!!!!!


Screencaps by Justin Halpern, In the Fame, Zap 2 It, Wall St Cheat Sheet, MTV, SpoilerTV, TV.com, DVD Release Dates, LA Times, TV Fanatic, CinemaBlend, TV by the Numbers, AOL, and TV Guide.



About the Author - Dahne
One part teacher librarian - one part avid TV fan, Dahne is a contributing writer for SpoilerTV, where she recaps, reviews, and creates polls for Sleepy Hollow, Arrow, White Collar, Grimm, Teen Wolf, and others. She's addicted to Twitter, live tweets a multitude of shows each week, and co-hosts the Warehouse 13 "Endless Wonder", Sleepy Hollow "Headless," and Teen Wolf "Welcome to Beacon Hills" podcasts for Southgate Media Group. Currently she writes a Last Week in TV column for her blog and SpoilerTV. ~ "I speak TV."

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